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How to Understand Holy Quran Better?

quran1“I swear by the places where the stars set. Indeed it is a great oath, should you know. This is indeed a noble Qur`an, in a guarded Book—no one touches it except the pure—gradually sent down from the Lord of the Worlds.” (Surat al-Waqi’ah, Verses 75-80)

The Holy Quran is the eternal miracle of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuhahf). It is a book that illuminates all things. Though it is composed of simple words and phrases, it is stated in a high literary style and conveys ideas that soar far beyond the comprehension of a normal human being. To perceive its essence and accurately derive laws from it, is immensely difficult. Thus, despite the fact that the Quran is “clear,” to properly understand it and act upon it takes great effort. If you like to understand the Holy Quran better, the following points are its prerequisites:

  1. You should attain a purity of soul and a desire to seek the truth so that you can approach the “pure ones.” As the Holy Quran says, “Only the humble can be reminded.”
  1. You should eliminate arrogance and prejudice and approach the Qur`an with fear and humility. Arrogance distances one from Allah’s (swt) proximity, so does it blind the heart, thereby preventing it from comprehending the Qur`an.
  1. You should have a thorough knowledge of the ‘Arabic language: both its vocabulary and grammar. These can be attained through the disciplines of morphology, syntax, rhetoric, style and vocabulary.
  1. You should have an in-depth knowledge of Islamic history and the circumstances surrounding the revelation of the verses. You should know the Quranic sciences; For example, you should know the general verses and the specific ones; the unqualified verses and the qualified; the verses that abrogate and those that are abrogated.
  1. You should seek protection from Allah (swt) from the cunning of Satan and from the trickery of his own lower soul. Saying: “I seek refuge from Satan, the cursed one” 
  1. You should start by saying the bismillah. 
  1. You should know all the verses that are in any way related to the verse in question as well as all the narrations that speak to the verse. The latter is especially important because the verses of the Quran have deeper, hidden meanings that no one other than the Infallibles can access.
  1. You should put aside all personal bias so that you can effectively comprehend what the Quran has to say. If you find that the Quran contradicts your previous understanding, you must accept the Quran’s teaching and abandon your prejudice. Otherwise, you will end up imposing your own view on the Quran (al-tafsir bi al-ra’y).
  1. You should look at the Quran from a metaphysical viewpoint so that you do not attribute physical traits to Allah (swt) nor liken him to his creation. To do this, you should interpret equivocal verses (al-mutashabihat) in light of unequivocal ones (al-muhkamat) and authentic traditions.
  1. You should also be aware of the needs of the day. You should be aware of scientific advancements and should keep a look out for the fulfillment of certain divine promises that are found in the Quran. In this way you will better be able to satisfy the needs of the younger generation. As Imam Ja’far b. Muhammad as-Sadiq says: “Allah has not sent this Quran for one age or another, not for one people or another. Rather, it is perpetually fresh and attractive to all people.”
  1. Your intention in reading and studying the Quran should not be limited to attaining the reward for reading it, nor to using the verses in speaking and writing. Instead of making the Quran an investment for this world, you should make it an investment for the afterlife. You should seek insight and understanding, and should seek to act according to its precepts.
  1. When you read verses concerning Allah’s (swt) mercy and his promises of Paradise, you should feel hopeful and should enjoin yourself to obey Allah (swt) and to abandon sin. And when you read verses containing threats of hellfire and descriptions of its punishment, you should frighten yourself of sinning against Allah (swt). All this is to purify your heart and prepare the way to eternal felicity.
  1. When you read verses that describe the believers and those who fear Allah (awj) and do righteous deeds, and when you read verses describing the disbelievers, the pagans, the beliers and the hypocrites, you should weigh yourself against the scale of the Quran. You should take account of yourself, and purify yourself of all bad attributes and adorn yourself with righteousness. As Allah (swt) has said, “I have only created Mankind and the Jinn to worship me.”

How to Get Prepared for the Death?

PREPARE-FOR-DEATHDeath is a reality in which all human beings believe. However, it is also a reality which most of us like to keep out of our minds.

In Islam, death is not an end to our existence; it is a passage, which takes us from this world to the hereafter – the actual purpose for our creation and the result of our work in this life.

Whether we fear death or not depends on how much we have prepared for the reckoning of the Day of Judgment.

Preparing for death is a lifetime’s job. It begins on the day you reach the age of bulugh and are held accountable for your deeds in the eyes of Almighty Allah.

Imam ‘Ali bin Abu Talib (a.s.) has beautifully described the preparation for death as follows: “Fulfilling the obligations, refraining from forbidden [things], and acquiring noble character.”

Some of the things which all believers are either required or strongly urged to do just before death by the Shari’ah are as following:

  1. Try your best to fulfill the obligations, which are upon you in regard to the creatures as well as the Creator
  1. Return to the owners whatever has been given to you as a trust or write it down in your will so that the executor of your will shall return the trust to its rightful owner.
  1. Dispose up to one-third of your estate for whomsoever or whatever cause you like. As for the two thirds, it must be distributed among your heirs according to the shares allocated for them in the Shari’ah.
  1. Make a will in writing or verbally about those religious obligations which you could not fulfill by yourself and which cannot be done on your behalf by others except after your death: the qadha prayers, fasting and pilgrimage (hajj), etc.
  1. Specify the amount from the one-third of your estate to be used to hire people to do above mentioned deeds. If you cannot afford this, then you may request your heirs to do unfulfilled rituals on your behalf voluntarily or pay someone else to do so.
  2. Include your deserving relations in the one-third of your estate if your financial circumstances allow you.
  3. Forgive your brethren in faith for whatever wrong they may have done to you.
  4. Ask your brethren in faith to forgive you for the intentional and unintentional wrong you may have done to them.

How to Get a Flat belly ?

How-to-Get-a-Flat-belly1-Don’t eat anything for two to three hours before sleep. Your body slows down when you sleep, which will prevent your body from digesting the food in your stomach properly.

 

2-Eat healthier. There’s no real secret when it comes to having a flat-tummy friendly diet — you simply need to eat more healthy foods like fruit, veg, and whole grains, and cut down on junk food, like candy, chips and fast food. Just by making this simple switch, you’ll see a world of difference to your stomach.

Eat lots of lean protein. Beans, nuts, and lean meat are rather good for you as long as you do not eat the fat!

3-Eat whole grains. Look for labels that say “100% whole grain” or “100% whole wheat” and not just “wheat flour.” Whole grains keep you fuller longer, which can help with weight loss and getting a flat tummy.

4-Eat low-fat dairy products. Switch out your high-fat dairy for low-fat options, which are rich in protein and vitamin B6.

 

5-Reduce your portion sizes. Rather than eating the wrong kinds of foods, many people just eat too much of the right foods. You should eat just enough until you feel full, then stop. If you’re eating regular, healthy snacks throughout the day, this shouldn’t leave you feeling hungry.

6-Try to chew more slowly and thoroughly when you eat. Chewing your food well helps to speed up the digestion process in the stomach, leaving you feeling less bloated and gassy.

7-Take small breaks in between every bite of food when eating. The extra time will give your stomach a chance to realize that it’s full, thus preventing you from over-eating.

8-Eat low-glycemic index foods. These items take longer to digest, so you feel full longer. Your body will slowly absorb the nutrients so you’ll avoid any spikes or drops in your blood sugar until your next meal.

9-Try to cut as much sugar from your diet as possible. Besides being full of empty calories, having less sugar in your system will help to lower your insulin levels.

 

 

10-Eat small, frequent meals. Replace your usual system of eating three large meals a day, with eating smaller, more regular meals. Many people make the mistake of eating nothing at all between breakfast, lunch, and dinner, especially when they are trying to lose weight.

 

11-Drink plenty of water. You should replace all your regular beverages with water, especially soda and sugared drinks which are full of empty calories and will cause your stomach to bloat.

Pay attention to your body’s signs. Your urine should be a light yellow or clear color; dark yellow with an odor could be a sign that you are dehydrated.

 

12-Do exercises daily. Sure, you can do 100 crunches a day, but if you’ve got a layer of belly fat covering up your ab work then what’s the point? You need to burn the top layer of stomach fat to see the changes. Cardio exercises will heat up your core temperature and improve circulation, both of which will aid in acquiring a flat stomach. Strive for at least 30 minutes a day minimum, but include 1-2 days of rest each week.

 

How to Become Free from Sex Desire?

desire1-Avoid stimulating things:

This includes looking at attractive and sexy figures, Though sexy figures should be the most avoided, you should also avoid looking at women.
In addition to avoiding looking, you should avoid touching women by shaking, hugging, etc.. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t act normally with near relative women/girls, such as sisters, mothers, aunts, daughters and nieces, since it’s acceptable to see them and touch them the proper way.

2-Avoid thinking about sex and stimulating things, and try to fill your time with something useful, especially Islamic study and worship.

You may also register in a club, group or maybe get a job. Try not to have a lot of time alone since that could turn you thinking about what stimulates your desires (though it’s recommended to have your own time where you can think about the world and yourself!).

3-Never engage in forbidden relationships.

4-Never masturbate: this is considered a dirty habit by Muslims and is punishable under Islamic law. If you start, you will find it very difficult to stop .

5-Avoid finding yourself alone with a girl/woman, since this is the most dangerous situation which will frequently lead to an illegal relationship.Remember that Shaytan is always the third one present.

6-Think about the guarantee promised by Islam. Islam gives you the ultimate guarantee of safety, provided that you obey its laws.

7-Find a worthwhile hobby, something to think about that interests you.

Whenever you get any idea of this kind or you are in a situation where you may have a chance to fulfill your desires, just start thinking about that very thing or idea that interests you. It may be about your time with your best friends or a journey or about something would like to do to bring you closer to Allah .

8-Fast to reduce sexual desires as per Islamic teachings.

The Prophet (PBUH) said: “O young people, whoever of you can afford marriage should marry because it is more (conducive to) lowering the gaze and more protective of the private parts; and whoever is not able to marry should fast, because fasting diminishes his sexual desire.

How to Repent to Allah?

the-prayer“And most surely I am most Forgiving to him who repents and believes and does good, then continues to follow the right direction.”  (Qur’an; 20:82)

The Messenger of Allah (swt) also says: “A repentant person is like one who has no sin.”

Once a man came to Imam Ali (as) to repent and when the Imam realized that the man was ignorant of the importance of repentance, he said to him, “Do you know the meaning of repentance? It has an exalted position. It has six conditions for its acceptance and the last two are the conditions of its completion.” Now let’s see what these six conditons are:

  1. Feeling ashamed and regretful for the past sins;

The first one is regretting what has passed. It means looking at the dark deed and being so sorry and ashamed of it that it makes your heart burn.

  1. Taking firm decision for avoidance of sins forever;

The second condition that forms the basis of reference is a decisive resolution not to repeat the foul deed again. Repentance does not depend on the enormity of sin. Every kind of sin, whether big or small, lends itself to repentance provided the Penitent is serious in his or her intention .

  1. Paying all the dues of the people so that when he meets God-Almighty on the Resurrection Day, he does not have any pending claim against him;

One of the two conditions for the acceptance of repentance is to return what belongs to others, whether it is something that is seized or a right that has been trampled on. It must either be returned itself or, at least, the rightful owner must be given satisfaction. If you have nothing left to give back and for example the rightful owner is no longer living, seek forgiveness from God. God willing, He will make that person satisfied.

  1. All the religious obligations (Wajibat) which have not been performed in the past should be discharged as makeup (Qadha) obligations;

Similarly, heavenly rights must also be restored. What are heavenly rights? If you have failed to observe the fast or perform your ritual prayer or failed to make your obligatory pilgrimage to Mecca in spite of being able to bear it physically and financially, you must make up for all these failuresbecause this is the second condition for the acceptance of your repentance.

  1. The person Should feel so sad about his past sins that all the bodily flesh formed as a result of eating forbidden (Haram) should be melted in a manner that skin touches the bare bones until the new flesh is reformed again;

The next point Imam Ali (peace be upon him) mentioned about the condition for the acceptance of repentance is to rid oneself of all the flesh that has grown on one by illegitimate means. This requires the mortification of the flesh, abstinence and self-discipline. It means benefitting from what is legitimate, honest and proper.

  1. The inconvenience and hardship of worshipping should be imposed upon the body as a compensation for the pleasures it fasted because of past sins.

The last condition is to let the body which has tasted the sweetness of sin, also taste the pain of deviation and worship. Fasting is not an easy matter especially if you spend the night in prayer.

How to Control our Anger?

angerNone of us is free from the vice of anger but the true test is that can we control it or not?! As the world around us has become more chaotic and frustrating, anger has also increased. The tiniest of things make us angry…be it on the road, talking to an annoying/irritating person, in the market, at the office and even at home. Let’s look at what Islam has to say about it.

Holy Quran says:… (The believers) are hard against the unbelievers and merciful among themselves… (48:29)

The Messenger of Allah [s] also said in response to  a man’s request for advice: “Do not be angry”. The man repeated the same question and (the Prophet) again said: “Do not be angry,” and continued: “He is not strong and powerful who throws people down but he is strong who withholds himself from anger.”

Imam Ali also said: “Protect yourself from anger for its beginning is insanity and its end is remorse.”

Now the question arises what to do when one gets angry. Let’s look at some traditions and recommendations:

  1. Say ` Aozo Billah-e-Menash Shaitanir Rajim;
  2. Change your position or place when you become angry and excited by sitting if you are standing, standing if you are sitting;
  3. Leave the place for another open place and breath as deeply as possible while raising and lowering the hands slowly;
  4. Do ‘Wazu’ and wash your hands and face;
  5. Drink water and eat a little dried grapes;
  6. If you are angry with any relative, touch your his body. This will pacify your anger;
  7.  Think of the greatness of Allah and His ability to punish criminals and of His patience and forgiveness if they repent and do good;
  8. If you can drive out your anger from yourself through a shout or some tears shed in private, it would be better for you;
  9. Look forward to the reward of Allah and think of the good end that Allah has promised the patient;
  10. Impartially study the problem that has caused you to become angry, and even if the cause isn’t yours, confess your mistake and turn back to your reason.

How to Have concentration in  the Prayer (20 Recommendations)

 

The Muslim community in the French  Describing  the faithful persons (Mo’menin ), Allah (st) says in Holy Quran they are those whose hearts are present in  their Salah. Our prophet also says Allah (st) would not accept the prayer of the man whose heart  is not present in his prayer. But how can we have a present heart in our Salah? There are 20 practical points that might be helpful:

  1. Setting the Prayer Scene and Burning Incense

The place you say your Prayer should be special. Every item that can distract you from your Prayer should be taken care of. The room should be the one that you don’t use regularly, and should be neat and clean, a comfortable temperature, and dark. With comfortable temperature, you do not have to worry or entertain thoughts that may distract you when the room is hot or cold. Human skin is filled with thermal receptors that will constantly remind you of any discomfort to your body.

  1. Wudhu as a Way to Increase Your Attention

 Wudhu (formal/minor ablution) is one of the most effective ways to prepare the scene for your daily Prayer. It has powers to re-organize your thoughts before Prayer and assist you in offering your Prayer with confidence and not to be swerved by Satan, The Accursed.

  1. Understanding and Appreciating Allah (SWT)’s Presence

 It is always to your benefit if you were to ponder the Existence of Allah (SWT) and His Power, Signs and Decisions related to this world and the next. Appreciating His presence is one way of bringing humility into your heart and humbling yourself in Prayer, performed with attention and concentration. It is only He Who looks at you Mercifully during your Prayer, and you ought to keep this in mind every time you say your Prayer.

  1. Reminding Yourself Of Allah

One of the reasons why Adhan and Iqamah have been much emphasized before Prayer is to establish a strong link between the worshipper and his Creator, before he ventures into this sacred journey of Prayer and be in direct communication with The Almighty. This way, you start reminding and convincing yourself of the presence of Allah (SWT) before you begin Prayer.

  1. A Relaxed and Alert State of Mind

 An alert state of mind is one of the many vital ingredients of Prayer. If you are tired and exhausted, it is better to rest and do some deep breathing and relaxation exercises before you make the commitment to stand in front of your Lord.

  1. Understanding What You Recite

It is clear that if you don’t strive to learn and appreciate the meanings of the verses and glorification you proclaim in your Prayer, you stand very little chance of developing and maintaining the concentration you need to focus in Prayer. Focusing on the meanings of what you recite would generally keep your mind busy and involved in Prayer.

  1. Proper Pronunciation

Arabic language is considered one of the sweetest of all the languages. So, reciting Prayer with proper Makhaarij (proper pronunciation) and Tajweed (following the rules of the Arabic Language) and learning the rules of reciting The Qur’an, would make your efforts in maintaining attention a lot easier.

  1. Alternating Recitations

Next, you need to alternate recitations by reciting different chapters of The Qur’an, different supplications and different forms of glorification in your Prayer. This is vital because your brain will not become accustomed and habituated to what is being recited daily and switch off attention to something else.

  1. Continued Cleanliness

An important and attractive aspect of Islamic teaching is related to cleanliness. It means to be ritually pure at all times by performing ablution (wudhu) and ghusl (major ablution) whenever necessary.

  1. Seeking Forgiveness and Accepting Limitations

After every Prayer you should seek forgiveness, as this will indirectly increase your attention and concentration during Prayer and bring you nearer to Him. While reciting this invocation, you should sincerely repent to Allah (SWT) that the Prayer you just finished was not up to the required standards and pray to be forgiven for it by The Merciful Lord. Then, you return to Him promising that the next Prayer will be a better one. This process in itself is a motivation to perform better next time you stand before the Almighty. Accepting faults will create in you desire to perform even better.

  1. Stress Management

Of the important cordial disciplines of worship, especially the invoking worship, one is tranquility. The person who prays should perform his worship with quietude of the heart and a tranquility of the mind.

  1. Moderation In Eating

Eating and drinking is also one of those matters with regard to which people go to extremes and, of course, mostly towards excess. No doubt, you need food to live and it is necessary that food should reach the cells of your body to maintain life. However, the important question is how much food your body needs and whether excessive food is good or harmful.

  1. Checking And Inspection

Keep track of the level of your attention and concentration in Prayer. If it is the right level, give thanks; if wrong, ask for forgiveness.

  1. Putting Thoughts in Writing

Unfortunately, in any relaxed state and in particular the Prayer, it is only human to have numerous creative thoughts, as well as recollections of things you forgot or need to do. These thoughts may haunt your continued meditation if you don’t write them down.

  1. Removing Obstacles

Also, before the Prayer, all obstacles in attaining heart’s presence must be removed. As such, you should relieve yourself before starting Prayer, and you should satisfy your hunger or thirst as well. Also, since over-eating creates a lack of attention and concentration, you should observe moderation if you have to eat before Prayer.

  1. Grief-Stricken, Submission and Sadness

No doubt, sadness brings to your soul many benefits, one of which is a revolution of the soul. It is the time when you are sad and grief-stricken, that you are able to fully organize and empower yourself to be most attentive in Prayer. It is widely accepted that a sad mind is more attuned towards an objective (Allah (SWT), in this case) and more capable of maintaining a high level of attention and concentration.

  1. Patience, Accepting Fault, and Addressing The Problem To Allah (SWT)

You should be patient with your practice of attention. You do not perform masterfully the first time in any given circumstance. It is the continued practice of meditation, relaxation and attention that reaps benefits. You should not expect specific benefits in a short period of time. Invoking Allah (SWT) and addressing your problem of inattention is a good practice, as He would definitely assist you in this matter.

  1. Arresting Thoughts

Because any individual’s mind is filled with thoughts at all times, he is supposed to arrest them, and put a stop on them during Prayer. When a thought comes, a command stop is used subconsciously to arrest and halt that thought and the person does not dwell on it. If this strategy is used on all incoming thoughts, then one will assume command and control over his incoming thoughts during Prayer.

  1. Remembrance Of Death

Great Scholars have advised you to keep busy reminding yourself of death as a way to fear Allah (SWT) and maintain vigilance in your daily Prayer and communication with Allah (SWT). The idea is to develop piety and fear in you and to convince your soul the importance of Prayer.

  1. Fixing Your Gaze

The Prophet (S) has said: “While a person is in the standing position during Prayer, he must be looking down fixing his gaze to the point where he places his forehead while in prostration; while in Ruku’ (bending position) the gaze should be between his two feet; while in Qunoot (when he raises his hands reciting the invocation) he should fix the gaze on the palms of his hands, placing them in front of his face; during Sajdah (prostration) his eyes looking at his nose; and while in the final sitting position the gaze to be towards his armpits.”

 

 

 

 

How to Read Holy Quran?

LearningReadingQuranThe Holy Quran is a book containing the words of Allah (swt). It should be treated with the respect it deserves. This respect should also extend to any book, such as this manual, wherein there are verses of the Holy Quran.

  1. The words of the Holy Quran should only be touched after doing Wudhu. Allah (swt) says: “None should touch it except the purified.” (al-Waqi’ah, 56:79)
  1. However, you may recite the words at any time, even without Wudhu. Allah (swt) says: “Those who remember Allah (swt) (recite Quran), standing, sitting and reclining, and think and wonder about the creation of the heavens and the earth…” (Ali Imran, 3:191)
  1. Always begin the recitation with Ta’awwudh. Allah (swt) says: “When you recite the Quran, seek refuge in Allah (swt) from Shaitan, the accursed.” (an-Nahl, 16:98) Ta’awwudh means to recite, “A’udhu Billahi minash Shaytaanir Rajeem“, which means “I seek refuge in Allah (swt) from Shaitan the accursed.
  1. After Ta’awwudh, recite “Bismillahir Rahmanir Rahim“, which means, “I begin in the name of Allah (swt), the Beneficent, the Merciful”.
  1. Even if you know the verses by heart, it is better to recite while looking at the words, as this increases the rewards many times.
  1. It is Sunnat to recite the Holy Quran with your head covered and while facing the Qiblah.
  1. While reciting the Holy Qur’an, we should think as if Allah (swt) is directly addressing Himself to us. But it should not be so for memorizing it or quoting it in our speeches to arouse passion.
  1. We should recite the Holy Qur’an in a way as it ought to be recited that is with clear pronunciation of words, in distinct manner, in good voice, with proper care of pauses and not in a hurriedly and unintelligible manner. As the Holy Qur’an says: “Recite the Qur’an distinctly.” (Surah Muzzammil, 73: 4) 
  1. After reciting the Holy Qur’an one should ponder over the meaning also as the Holy Qur’an has objected to those who recite it as a formality just by hurriedly moving their lips without knowing the meaning. The Holy Qur’an says: “Do they not ponder over the Qur’an?” (Surah an-Nisa, 4:82)
  1. While reciting the Holy Qur’an, we should bear in mind the narrations of our infallible Imams about relevant verses of the Holy Qur’an as well as the background of the revelation of those particular verses as to the specific occasions so that we are not distracted from its true meaning and we do not deviate from our basic faith. We should not derive the incorrect meaning of the verse howsoever conservative or progressive it may be in outlook .
  1. When the Quran is being recited, listen attentively and do not eat or talk. Allah (swt) says: “And when the Quran is recited, listen to it with (full) attention, so that you may be blessed with mercy.” (al-A’raf, 7:204)
  1. Do not leave the Holy Quran open and unattended or in a place where it may be disrespected. Recite from it regularly and do not leave it unread on the shelf. Allah (swt) says: “And the Prophet (s.a.w.) shall say, “O my Lord! Verily my people abandoned this Quran.” (al-Furqan, 25:30)
  1. Worn-out pages of the Holy Quran or paper with verses of the Holy Quran must not be thrown in the bin. Instead they should be recycled or buried.

How to Be More Generous?

generosity01Generosity is one of the ethics of the Prophets, a pillar of faith and a ray of the light of firm faith. The Noble Prophet (s.a.w) has said: “The ‘auliya’ (friends) of Allah are, essentially and inherently, generous.” Hence, in order to acquire this attribute, a Mu’min should endeavor hard to be munificent and generous towards relatives, deserving ones and the like, for the pleasure of Allah.

It is better that a person’s generosity be associated with a thing that is dear to him – eatables, clothes, money etc. – and that no obligation is placed upon the person towards whom generosity has been exhibited; man should only view himself as a trustworthy person, whose responsibility is to pass on Allah’s things to deserving and needy individuals.

As such, he should stay away from frugality and refrain from withholding the Divine trusts; this is because it is not known whether or not they would yield any benefit, if given after his death, and whether or not his inheritors would expend them in a correct and appropriate manner?

In the following you can see some simple acts which help you cultivate this characteristics in your personality:

  1. Give from the heart. If you truly want to be generous, then you have to give just because you want to give, not because you have ulterior motives and want something in return. You should give simply because you want to give, because you’ve found something you believe in, and because you want to do good in the world. If you’re only giving to impress other people or to ingratiate yourself with someone in some way, then you’re not really being generous.
  1. Know that being generous will make you happier. Though you shouldn’t be generous for the sake of furthering your own needs, you should know that people who are generous are known to be happier than those who are not: Being generous helps people feel more compassionate towards others, gives a stronger sense of community, and to establishes a higher self-image. While you are being generous towards others, you can also be generous toward yourself as well.
  1. Notice what would make someone’s life easier. Whether you’re interacting with your neighbors or your best friend, take a look at the person you’re talking to and see how you’ll be able to help that person out. Maybe your coworker is really stressed and needs someone to look after her dog while she’s visiting her sick mother in a different town. Maybe your best friend’s car broke down and she needs a ride to school. Maybe your mother is overworked and doesn’t even realize how much help she needs until you give it. When you talk to someone, start wondering about how you could help them instead of always thinking about how they can help you.
  1. Give your time to a friend. If your friend is down and needs some company, then you should be generous with your time and should hang out with that person. Make room in your schedule to spend time with that person, whether you’re taking a walk, going to the movies, or having a long talk over a cup of tea. No matter how busy you are, there should always be room in your life for hanging out with friends.
  1. Give to a cause you believe in. You don’t have to make a fortune to donate money to a reputable charity. Even if you’re only giving ten dollars a month, you’ll be doing good in the world and will feel good about yourself. You should give this amount right when you get your paycheck, instead of at the end of the month, when you see how much money you have left. You’ll be surprised by how little you’ll miss this money. Even putting some loose change in a tip jar can be a generous act.
  1. Volunteer. Volunteering your time is a great way to be generous. If you want to be generous, then spend at least an hour or two a week volunteering at a soup kitchen, tutoring adults or children, cleaning up a community park, or doing some other good out there in the world. You can do different tasks, such as volunteering in a bookstore, or helping at a fundraising campaign for charity. Find something that gives you meaning while expanding your generosity.
  1. Share your things. If you’re with friends, share your food, your clothes, your car, your home, or any of the things that mean something to you. If you’re just sharing something you don’t care about, then it’s not as meaningful. If you have just two delicious chocolates left and give one to a friend, that means more than giving your friend one of a hundred candy bars you don’t care about.
  1. Give away something you love. Give your favorite sweater to your little sister. Give your favorite novel to a friend. Give a beautiful notebook to a friend and encourage her to start writing poetry. Giving away something you don’t care about isn’t really generous because you’re not making a sacrifice. But giving away something that means something to you, which you know will do good for others, is the height of generosity.
  1. Call a friend who’s having a hard time. If you can’t be there in person, give your friend a call to check in, to say hi, and to show that you care. If you can just spare a few minutes to show that person that you’re thinking of him or her and to be kind and sincere, then you’ll be making that person’s day better, even if he or she is still struggling. Spending time trying to cheer up a person who is in need over the phone is very generous.
  1. Donate your stuff. Don’t just let those old sweaters or clothes sit in your closet for years. Take the time to sort through them and to donate them to charity so that someone else can find a good use for them. It won’t take long to sort through them or to drive them down to where they need to go, and you’ll feel good just thinking about someone else finding a better use for your clothes.

How to Cure Backbiting?

cure-backbitingThe Messenger of Allah (S) explains Ghiba  in the following words, “Ghiba  is remembering your brother in a way he dislikes.” (Makasib Muhrima)
Imam Sadiq (AS) says, “Ghiba  is exposing that aspect of your brother which Allah had concealed.” (Makasib, al-Kāfi Vol. 2 page 358)
Imam Mūsa Ibn Ja’far (AS) says, “If one speaks of a person in his absence about those of his traits which are actually present in him and people are also aware of it, it is not Ghiība. But if he mentions something which is present in the person but people are unaware of it, it would be Ghiība. Moreover if what he says is not present in the man, it is allegation (Bukhtān).”

If someone, God forbid, has been guilty of this ugly act, he or she must purge this vice and nourish the roots of sincerity, unity, and solidarity in his or her heart by following these steps:

  1. Meditate for a while about the effects of this sin in this world and in the Hereafter. Reflect on the fearsome, frightful forms that will beset you in the grave, in the Barzakh, and on the Day of Resurrection. Heed the words of the Holy Prophet (s) and his household (‘a) for their pearls of wisdom in this regard will overwhelm you. Then weigh a quarter of an hour’s pleasantries, gossip, and satisfaction of the imaginative lust against thousands upon thousands of years of adversity or eternal damnation in hell and everlasting painful chastisement!
  2. Consider this: even if you have enmity toward a person whom you backbite, that animosity requires that you should not resort to backbiting. It is stated in the traditions that the good deeds of the backbiter are transferred to the book of deeds of the victim of his backbiting, and the victim’s sins are transferred to the record of the backbiter.
  3. Repent and seek the forgiveness of the victim, if this is possible without any chance of vicious consequences; otherwise, you must implore God’s mercy for the victim.
  4. Gather all your strength to rid your soul of this sin at all cost, by making a covenant with yourself to abstain from this abominable for a certain time. Bring your tongue under control and be fully watchful of yourself, steadfastly vigilant, calling yourself to account. God willing, it is hoped that after some time you will find yourself reformed and free of its ill traces. Gradually the burden of the task will ease, and you will feel a natural disposition to dislike and detest it. At that point, you will come to possess spiritual peace and delight in achieving freedom from this vice.
  5. Backbiting often results from a weakness in the backbiter’s own soul, such as an inferiority complex. You should pry into your soul to discover what weakness prompted you to backbite your brother or sister; then set out to remedy the weakness.