What should we do if our parents argue often?

Question: My mother and father disagree with each other over everything, no matter how big or small, and we, the children, become upset whenever their quarrels begin. We are afraid and worried about the future of our family. The question is: what should we do?

The answer:

When your parents are at peace, talk to them about the negative effects of quarrel, which may destroy everyone’s future. But when they are quarreling, you have to be tolerant and indifferent towards what happens as long as there are no dangerous events. When you become impatient, go to a different place; for example, to another room or to the yard. When they begin quarreling, try to play a cassette of Qur’anic recitation or decide to exchange jokes amongst each other to stop their quarreling by laughter.

It is necessary for you to know that this state, although it is dangerous for your future if it continues, can be solved if you undertake your responsibility as adult children in the house and as alternatives to the parents who are sunken in the fire of rage and selfishness. Do not worry, you will soon grow and live independently away from them. In order to not be like your parents, you should take lessons from their state, for as Imam Ali (a.s.) has said, “a reasonable one is he who takes lessons from the experiments of others.”